Thought I couldn't live without you
It's going to hurt when it heals too
Oh yeah it'll all get better in time
Even though I really love you
I'm gonna smile because I deserve too
Oh it'll all get better in time

This isn’t exactly the best week, worlds are falling and truths start to unmask.

*

I can’t be there for you as readily as i want, but for all the bads that you’re feeling, i’m feeling too. It’s a tough phase but please don’t lose the fight. I need you to be strong always and keep fighting the blues like how you’ve always fought it all these years. For a very long time, it’s been about me but this time the spotlight is on you. I want you to know that andrew and i will be supporting you. We might not be the strongest, but we’ll be the most comforting. It’ll all get better in time.

*

I think people are really starting to become lazy and selfish. It isn’t really my issue whether some people are selfish or not, but when they get in my way, i get personal with it. I’m angry with people who refuse to take action. In case you haven’t realise, your self-discipline is essentially essential in this system. For anyone to just let this matter-of-fact fact pass them by, i get angry. Anger isn’t an emotion that i identify with well. I’m hardly angry person; i don’t even know what that is. But i actually got angry with a few too many selfish people this week. Get off the bed and work it.

A sad revelation came this week. I didn’t get shortlisted for law. Watching all those undeserving weirdoes from my platoon getting the interview while i didn’t really saddens me. Never in my point in life have i not gotten what i want. I got into sji, cj, ac, ocs all on my first choice. I didn’t get shortlisted for law. That is a real attack on my ego i think. When i found the conviction to read law, i really prayed hard that i’ll get that letter, but not now. I’m not getting it and i don’t think i ever will. What saddens me is that i didn’t even get a letter from ntu for linguistics. Double lit distinctions is apparently u-s-e-l-e-s-s. I thought i’ll be more qualified than most people but nope. Ain’t. Getting. A. Chance. Is it because i failed maths. It’s stupid. Now i’m not getting anywhere, that sucks.

It’s quite comforting to read stella (I do miss you too :/), rosel and qianzhi’s entries. I do feel cherished. These two years were great with all these girls.

*

无知 无心 等等等 这就是答案了
我已经走远了 却依然站在不远处

洋葱/杨宗纬

如果你眼神能够为我片刻的降临
如果你能听到心碎的声音
沉默的守护著你 沉默的等奇迹
沉默的让自己像是空气

大家都吃著聊著笑著今晚多开心
最角落里的我笑得多合群
盘底的洋葱像我 永远是调味品
偷偷的看著你 偷偷的隐藏著自己

如果你愿意一层一层一层的剥开我的心
你会发现 你会讶异 你是我最压抑 最深处的秘密
如果你愿意一层一层一层的剥开我的心
你会鼻酸 你会流泪 只要你能听到我 看到我的全心全意

听你说你和你的他们暧昧的空气
我和我的绝望装得很风趣
我就样一颗洋葱 永远是配角戏
多希望能与你有一秒专属的剧情

rOy.